A Conspiracy to Create Them

The best way to maintain a rather tenuous grasp on power is to be proficient, and that’ll happen for Barack Obama as soon as he admits to being wrong about something.  Hold your breath to lower your carbon footprint.  It’s far easier for someone unaccomplished yet arrogant to brush off opposition. His stupidly evil critics claim they’re experiencing pain just because their nervous system tells them it’s true.  Toss another hot anvil at them to cure that delusion.

Maybe you’re nuts.  No, don’t believe the hurtfulness.  Portraying sober opponents of overreach as crackpots is far easier than performing well. Meanwhile, this White House has promoted and/or achieved such radically psychotic goals that simply describing them makes critics sound like foil hat wearers.  Avoid patronizing any reactionary haberdasher who tries to sell you one without protective shiny layers both on top and underneath fabric, as that false economy isn’t worth it.

This is so unfair.  You keep blaming everything wrong on him just because he’s responsible.  The one thing you’re supposed to learn from this presidency is that individuals are not to be held accountable.   A sarcastic “Thanks Obama” is common enough that it’s long been used as a joke in response to any attempt that explodes in flames.  But it entered the parlance for a reason.  What if he actually was lousy? His lack of ability at anything more difficult than shaving would explain everything, although he adamantly maintains Keyser Söze is still on the loose.

The petulant zealotry began over half a century ago.  We don’t have to wade into Kenyan Muslim territory to establish this is a president with one weirdo background featuring several obviously influential radicals. The biggest thing to glean from this isolated mountebank’s oddball upbringing is that he thinks everyone is as easily duped by radical claptrap as he is. It’s hard to for someone so weird to feel empathy with what are allegedly fellow humans.

The scheme creator’s semi-commie impulses are manifested by decisions his foes couldn’t satirize.  Releasing terrorists after a massive attack is the sort of maniacal theory you’d think would be pushed on World Net Daily.  Likewise, demanding we accept migrants in the moments after France’s openness to refugees helped result in blood staining much of Paris is a bafflingly self-righteous move that would be suggested in a chain email your parents forward to you.  Instead, they actually occurred, at least if you believe the lamestream media.  There’s no fear-mongering involved in practicing ducking.

It’s not as clever as it looks for him to turn his lies about refusing to help an endangered ambassador in a country he ruined into an attack on those who notice.  Warping Benghazi into a punchline is a cute move by those who don’t know the murdered ambassador’s name.  The president really did b.s. about leaving that poor bastard to fend for himself after destabilizing a country. Obama counts on doing such preposterous things that explaining them makes one sound like a lunatic.  The key to a successful acting role is commitment.

Big Brother is bothering you.  It’s a shame how 1984 comparisons are overused and always seem melodramatic, as so many seem apt.  Orwellian is presently an understatement.  Constant semi-legal needling is how this clumsily aggressive White House keeps those noticing patterns from getting comfortable.  I wish the boss would stop validating conspiracies.  Emptying Gitmo after terrorists attacked our French friends is something that sounds like Snopes should debunk it.  But even they’d have to conclude it’s true, even if it would take 10 paragraphs.

The bully president only attacks those too polite to fight back, which is why he goes after those who dare like it here.  The difference between ‘Merica fans and those who mock awesome trucks with eagle decals is that we are capable of laughing at ourselves.  Meanwhile, snotty liberals who think they’re above embracing something without irony have the laughable policies.  Giggle at them with a dismissive wave as we fix this.

Cults fall apart without alluring leadership.  While there’s much work to do, it’ll be far easier to mobilize voters against these horrendous policies without a charismatic charlatan to push them. Those who fell under this seducer’s spell can spend the rest of their days coping with the shame of backing someone who armed Mexican gangs to push gun control.  Yes, that really happened.

The professional sadist thinks we’re gloating about suffering.  We’re just noting how we pointed out his horrendous ideas would cause tremendous pain. Nobody wants people losing insurance or ISIS drawing blood at will.  But we do know when it’s going to happen, namely after promising everyone gets it and kindness is the best defense, respectively.

Oblivious dolts who don’t accept how their policies cause the very pain in question need to be exposed.  It’s hard to believe just how radical a two-term president could be.  Yes, he does want to confiscate your money, guns, and borders.  At least you’re not crazy.

Anthony Bialy is a writer and “Red Eye” conservative in New York City. Follow him at http://twitter.com/AnthonyBialy. Download a free ebook of his 2014 columns at https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/505996.

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