Big Brother Is Bothering You

Freedom through control appeals to the wrong sort of “1984” fans.  The book’s not a comedy.  I’d ask those who skimmed it in high school to peruse it more carefully now, but trying to get people to read chapters is hopeless in the age where Facebook posts that spill onto a third line go unread.

Light readers don’t see the book as the ultimate cautionary tale about government: no, they admire authority’s efficiency and thoroughness.  I don’t think it’s meant as a guidebook, but this plot takes crazy turns.  On that note, one thing Orwell missed is that the most frightening part of a surveillance state would be how many people volunteered to be monitored.

A disturbing number of voters beg to be ordered around.  It’s easier than decisions.  Very reasonable people who understand how Earth functions want life without responsibility.  Is someone working on energy-burning doughnuts?  Just issue an executive order; they fix everything.  This warped version of a free life requires massive government intervention, and almost nobody’s well-read enough to know what irony means, much less have examples of it in mind.  There’s no literacy test for handouts, so gimme free tuition.

Letting someone else care for you means you’re not fully human.  Instead of finding a job, the empty deadbeats will make themselves feel fuller by banning criticism.  First to be silenced will be anyone pointing out the social justice mob is comprised of kids no matter their ages. Claim it’s society that benefits from funding your desires in order to maximize self-righteousness.  Growing up is inevitable while growing old is optional, according to the writer of a coffee mug slogan who shouldn’t be advising anyone.

Anyone seeking a guarantee from government for their own life is ruining it for others.  I bet they call workers greedy.  You’re free to to strum a guitar for as many hours as you’d like as long as you don’t expect others to buy you dinner after your fingers tire.  Aw, it’s so nice to bring tunes to the world.  But same world should like it enough to compensate you for providing pleasant sounds.  That’s not even factoring how most street bums aren’t hidden virtuosos.  Delusion doesn’t propel the economy as far as you’d hope.

A skill is irrelevant if nobody will pay to be entertained.  The whole point is to find someone who likes what you do enough to offer compensation.  Motivation makes life work.  On the other hand, it’s so mean to expect a delusional slacker to quit pursuing a useless career to learn a trade.  What next: buying the insurance you personally use?

Who pays for it?  Wondering who’s going to be stuck holding the bill is most important thing to ponder in every life aspect.  For adults.  By contrast, kids want to go back to Showbiz Pizza Place the day after their birthdays.  The difference is fun-loving kids have the excuse of being born only a decade ago. If today’s hypersensitive old youths do think about the subject of costs, it’s only to be glad someone else picked up the check.  They don’t care as long as it’s not them.  That’s what makes them selfless. Through sheer chance, those who are isolated from the checkout also don’t seem interested in going to some job.

Everyone else must work twice as hard to compensate for those who don’t work much at all, so let’s wrap up the break and get back to it.  People expecting to receive what they want without toil are no longer shamed out of the village.  Predictably, the entire commune is fading.

The overwhelming burden on the few who remain employed is exacerbated by supporting both themselves and society’s loafers.  That tremendous tension really helps cope with semipermanent financial crisis.  Don’t worry, as the White House is releasing as many terrorists as they can to relieve more stress.

Covering one’s own’s bills used to signal adulthood.  Now, it means being a sucker.  At least that’s the sad outlook of today’s Michael Jacksons who are proud of never growing up.  Of course, the true suckers are men in the mirror who think they’ll get away with mooching for eternity.  On the other hand, bank robbers never get caught while slot machine players will eventually beat the house.  Economic triumph just takes perseverance.

Everyone with a card that never gets declined must have stolen their riches from the jobs they’re at all day.  It never occurred to proud bums that those with wealth may have earned it.  But why learn about unwritten rules?  The same government that hands them a comfortable living can be used to silence those upset about freeloaders.  Getting the remaining grownups to keep funding the sprees of others is trickier, especially because that takes work.

Anthony Bialy is a writer and “Red Eye” conservative in New York City. Follow him at Download a free ebook of his 2015 columns at


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