Rulebook Confetti

If you’d like proof that contemporary pompous idiots can’t build a better country, look around.  Ignoring the Constitution is an unprincipled sort of principle.  The lawlessness feels uncomfortable, but stick around for the stagnation.  Technology makes humans feel smarter than they are, especially those with the intelligence of butter churns.

It’s a supreme folly that modern man is less stupid than counterparts with the misfortune to be born earlier.  A wifi connection proves nothing more than the ability to occasionally pay a bill or mooch from neighbors who use dog names as passwords. Yet some use today’s marvels to condemn any notion from the parchment era as outdated.  What could William Shakespeare know about me?  He didn’t even Snapchat.  Modern arrogance prompts scoffing at universal rights like they’re as antiquated as Atari. Meanwhile, the same myopic snobs pursue economic policies discredited last century and pimp windmills that predate colonialism.

The notion that we should be free to conduct our affairs as we see fit is so old because it’s so fundamental.  The thoughts of 18th-century men who didn’t wish to be bothered remain applicable unless cruel and unusual punishment is the cool new trend.  This election violates the Eighth Amendment.

The Constitution hasn’t been burned only because it’d add to our carbon footprint.  I’m not looking forward to heading forward with those who condemn as obsolete a document which prohibits the government from shutting down their blogs.  It’s uncannily tiresome how often we have to reply to those who point out the Second Amendment was written in the musket era that they’re not tweeting via printing press.  Bad guys upgrade their firearms, so we’d better keep up.  I’m just glad the right to do so is written down. It’s easy to look up for anyone who thinks novel comforts confirm human advancement.

Universal situations don’t change with access to air conditioning.  The Founders knew what many today do not, namely that every age is plagued by people who think accumulation equals wisdom. Our year’s people are quite arrogant for a bunch of moping brats who think the government makes people rich.  Many don’t realize the men who created our nation could also accurately predict the future. Today’s Vox-style boasters are as surprising as a light switch.  For dudes living in the olden days, the guys who recognized natural rights sure were smart.

But nobody’s praising a whig-wearing white man who believed in freedom to spend one’s own income here in the future.  Progressives who have presided over no progress style themselves as more brilliant than James freaking Madison, who was 36 at the Constitutional Convention.  Today’s deep thinkers wonder how he could get any work done in his childhood bedroom.

Disgust at what’s past means trouble now.  Take how we don’t get a choice of at least one candidate who cares about the rules. You’d think that’d be a requirement.  But the Constitution has the nerve to respect free will.  We’re stuck with the effects of various lousy outcomes that follow disregarding established truths.  The president thinks checks and balances prevent us from buying happiness Greek-style.  And this limp tyrant is sure to be followed by someone who thinks being called a despot is a compliment.  We’re not going to wait for some legislature to approve: we have progress to pimp.

Designers of Humans 2.0 must feel unrestrained.  Limits on power are inconvenient.  Our government is not designed to take trillions from you to buy things you never knew you wanted.  The fact it has to be stated states it all.  Getting away with doing as they wish is confirmation to fanciful lawmakers that they should continue imposing their purportedly enlightened will.  But getting things done doesn’t necessarily overlap with doing good.  Burying three hoboes today doesn’t mean four should be tomorrow’s goal.

Measure success by how it’s unappreciated.  It’s hard to notice what works smoothly.  Something that creates tranquility ironically inspires resentment in boring minds.  We’re blessed with a government designed to not hassle us, and all brats can do is complain about how they had to make up an insurance mandate in order to get a few poor people poorer insurance at great expense.  And you say our system of government is up-to-date.

Today’s enlightened citizens are oppressed by not having enough federal force in their lives.  Who can be free without orders?  Deciding what to do distracts from freedom as much as having to generate income.  Tell us what to do and make others pay for it, already.  A detailed itinerary issued by a government minder isn’t a constitutional requirement, which leads me to believe it’s not sophisticated enough for 2016’s adult babies.

That unencumbered feeling is normal.  The very thing that enables their whinging is what the national statists hope to destroy.  They’d appreciate the irony were they as clever as they believe.  Sadly, contemporary pinkos are about to get help from the overbearing executive: there’s not one presidential candidate who says you deserve to be left alone as guaranteed by law.  Those not good at running anything want to run our days.  They can at least extend the courtesy of not pretending their laws are legal.


Magic Money

Life is easy once you realize you can order things into being.  This ability is real and will never go away.  We just have to vote for enlightened representatives of humanity who believe strongly enough in the power of orders.  Going in a different direction won’t be an issue in any upcoming election because of the enlightened refusal to run anyone not committed to warping reality through bossiness.  It’s unsurprising that politicians who issue innumerable orders think they can bend the world’s will.  We’re just a bureaucrat’s rule away from car engines that run on good karma.  Don’t let the Kochs stop it.

Just give the economy some money to spend.  Don’t be silly and think it comes from nowhere: the semi-venture capital is taken from rich villains who don’t deserve it.  And you thought free money wasn’t funded.  Modern robber barons will just earn more by exploiting proles.  Selling goods and offering jobs is today’s equivalent of train robberies.

But maybe taxing has a negative effect at the source.  Remember to look shocked when the money flow becomes a trickle.  We know from experience class warfare doesn’t help the poor, but at least we can blow up the rich.  I’m sure egalitarian destruction can be just as satisfying.

Wars continue apace whether or not they involve much literal shooting. The recovery is on its way.  The previous sentence has waited to come true longer than any in our language.  Don’t think of the Barack Obama presidency as one where every day was spent enduring economic stagnation: there hasn’t been a moment without America waging war, either.  Except for both parts, we’ve had peace and prosperity.

The recovery takes time, claim those who still yearn to blame Bush. Great Pumpkin fans still wait for the magical multiplying effect.  It’d also be helpful if the debt clock starting rolling down.  Mathematics cruelly is unhelpful.  Have we tried sorcery?  Barack Obama swears by his spells, although he insists they don’t constitute a religion.

Humans who think faith breeds arrogance sure are committed to ending illness legally.  Mandatory insurance is a way of demanding everyone be healthy by law.  Those who look pale don’t want to be criminals in addition to being sick, as it’s hard for those too feeble to hold a shiv to get in a prison gang.  Hillary will never let you join no matter how many ballpoint pen needle tattoos you have.  It’s tough to retain the lesson that saying everyone has something differs from everyone having something.  Let’s go to college for free if we ever heal.

You buy my dinner.  I counted what’s in your wallet, and you can afford it.  I wouldn’t put you in a licentiously awkward position by expecting you’d ask me to accompany you to neck in the alley behind the restaurant as compensation.  We have the resources to care for everyone, note those who care for no one.  Mandatory divvying is the only way some can cope with their refusal to help voluntarily.  Everyone else is dragged in, then down.  The conscience compensation is as effective at changing minds as anything else done by force.

The whole reason we have enough to cover bills is because we’re not compelled to buy cellphones and cable for others.  Oops: that stuff belongs to persons, not people.  The rest of the party is entitled to what you made in elaborate fantasies where everything is up for grabs and everyone gets the same.  Earning is frowned upon except as a means to get it back to fund the collective.  Consider it punishment for the sin of promotion.

It’s fine to enjoy the magic act as long as you remember the tricks aren’t actually changing natural law.  Joe Biden’s still trying to pull quarters out of ears.  The phony wizardry embodies the worst sort of arrogance, namely that paired with ineptness.  The only real part is your money disappearing.

A frightening percentage of residents in these enlightened times can’t tell apart a good suggestion and order.  Even better, many of those are both permitted to vote and actually do so, presuming they don’t starve after getting lost on the way to polling places.  There’s zero evidence to faithfully assume government has not only the responsibility to monitor every detail but is skilled at it.  Yet some believe sight unseen.  Note them by their mockery of Christians.

The order to do something unpleasant is for your own good.  Good luck buying decent lightbulbs.  It’s not enough to use disease-laden canvas grocery bags or check the calories in the dinner bag of Doritos: Fairyand’s patrons have to impose such silly decisions on others.  They have just the magical leaders to force you.  Name a politician who you’d trust to feed your fish, much less supervise your money.  Like progress, they think their power comes from nowhere.

It Is What It Isn’t


We can actually have a discussion about government’s role if our bunkers are as fireproof as the website with the blueprints claims.  Anyone who remembers there’s a Constitution to obey may as well gain something worthwhile from the most worthless matchup imaginable.  We can choose to remember rules in a way the two lawbreakers running don’t offer.

The lush picking between Budweiser and Miller can shotgun the result of his purchase until it seems like there’s more than one option, but anyone sober knows swill’s getting imbibed either way.  There’s not even a pretend opponent to statism this time.  Not having to fake caring is a relief in its way.  Donald Trump’s a conservative in the same sense you can rent a suite in his Plaza. Sure, those who’ve noticed bullying won’t bring prosperity are missing the thrill of jumping from planes without a parachute.  You’ll hear zealous adherents of bold stunts screaming about how we shouldn’t sit out the fun from our lawn chairs.  We’re making sure we and our coolers are clear of the splatter zone.

Let’s persevere and get back to where we can hate each other for genuine reasons.  Sure, everyone wants to murder everyone else now.  But at least we can return to ideological consistency where conservatives are despised by those who think helping the poor requires a mandate. It’s mean to tell someone to go to church.

I want a candidate who’s loathed by people who think Scott Walker makes Satan look respectable.  The malice must be accurate.  Don’t link people who’ve read Hayek in their free time with the clown who had a poor ghostwriter churn out Think Big and Kick Ass. Liberals should extend the courtesy of hating actual conservatives for the right reasons, no matter how anti-mathematical said reasons may be.

This time, the purported GOP leader wants to access power only to make others obey.  That sounds like a progressive caricature to me.  At least, we can finally establish that Republican and conservative are not synonyms.  Of course, they’ve rarely been neighbors in the thesaurus, and even then only by coincidence.  Neither major candidate is big on obeying the dictionary.

Evolution is going backward if that proves any theories.  It’s hard to claim our species is advanced when it’s clearly getting collectively dimmer.  Technology isn’t doing the thinking for us as much as it is making it easy to let the brain atrophy. Modern humans access the entirety of knowledge through magic pocket screens.  Many use them to read Trump’s tweets.  Some forget to mock, if you’d like to envision the horror of taking him seriously.  He’s sticking it to stupid eggheads, what with their books and glasses.

The only guarantee is that guarantees are useless.  It’s economically and philosophically tough to advance when the government promises access. Both major-party junta leaders promise fantastical developments where you don’t have to work for your goods, and I can assure you there will never be a devastating catch.

True patriots want a president who doesn’t care about you, at least personally.  Decent leaders trust those in less glamorous jobs to utilize their talents.  In this case, they’re supposed to delegate by law.  Instead, modern goon style emphasizes ridiculous promises purportedly funded by pillorying designated faux villains.  From punishing success to demonizing trade, human behavior is under fire.

Our progressive friends may be unhappy to spend time with us after we point out how many times the orange Trump leans blue.  They’re already less enthusiastic about our companionship that they should be for such swell folks as us.  There are a disturbing number of voters from both parties who want a government powerful enough and willing to push around others. The secret they don’t want you to know and may not even admit to themselves is they’re comfortable knowing they’ll get pushed, too.   Admit you’re scared by donning a red hat.

Our enemies only change their names and knockoff jeans brands.  A happy ending means the story’s not over.  Those aware of this fact suspected the Soviet Union was ever going to turn into something pleasant upon its inevitable dissolution.  The next chapter is as dismaying as feared.  People with a curious tradition of begging to be dominated get tingly in their bathing suit areas when they picture Putin-style posing.  Sure, neither the country nor style is great. But at least you don’t have to make decisions.

Trump fans seem uncomfortable, what with the nasty raging at the world and everything about it.  So propose a mutually-beneficial solution: invite them to move to the Motherland of adidas-clad bears drunk on vodka. Telling someone to go to Russia is not just an offer to a commie anymore, although I certainly invite Bernie Sanders fans to experience firsthand the joy of vigorous statism.  They can travel with Trump fans as future neighbors who share more in common than either group will ever admit.  Oh: you like to boss around others, too.

As with Vladimir’s woeful sycophants, Trump’s party-ruining goon squad just needs constant direction to reach presently elusive euphoria. The tradition of waiting for a president to tell them what to do will help them overcome the grayness.  They can still adore supposed strongmen making the nation vigorous in what’s not at all compensation for limp raging.  This is the party of Putin stooge Paul Manafort now, so fans should think about where they’d feel at home. It’s like Jews moving to Israel, only without the anti-Semitism.

Contemporary Russia features the bossy style and tacky architecture Trump adores. Once he and his hateful lackeys realize their spiritual home is far from their present addresses, the urge for pointless vandalism will dissipate.  Settling in New Trumpistan after their cult leader makes the land purchase of the century in Siberia will take them far.  Most importantly, it’d be away from us.

Convene Away Trump

Trump missing nameIt speaks to how stupid this era is that the best option may be to let people suffer for their mistakes.  Starbucks might not be overpriced and bitter next time, so let’s drink eight bucks worth of stomach rottenness to test again.  The question that’s plagued Republicans since doom won enough primaries will be answered soon enough.  We’re probably screwed whether conventioneers keep or ditch Donald Trump, but let’s argue about parachutes before the ground arrives.

Fighting amongst ourselves is a nice change of pace. We’ve been getting along too well.  At least the debate about whether Republicans should violate the Prime Directive will intrigue us through cosmic despair.  Should we make voters cope with their hideous decision or attempt to save ingrates who aren’t about to embrace the life preserver just because they’re drowning?  This party needs an intervention.  But it may not deserve one.  Enjoy searching for meth in the dumpster with GOP pollsters.

The irksome optimist would note we know the practical effects of an impractical man demonstrating what happens when bull hits reality. Painful consequences don’t make civilization’s worst possible election better. Convincing rubes of success through superficial gold despite constant trips through the mud is different from trying to get 270 electoral votes.  At this rate, Trump is fighting for 270 votes.  How many Twitter users have “Aryan” in their bios?

It’s tough to put together a competent campaign, which is partly why Trump will never do it.  The main reason is because he’s him.  We’ll eating Trump Steaks in his Plaza before he figures out there’s a right way to run and his way.  Calling any dissent “dumb” is one method for attempting to inspire voters.  The 70-year-old infant will bitch no matter the result, so it may as well be preemptive.

Remember that everyone wants the same thing.  Specifically, neither we nor Trump want him to be president.  He’d secretly be relieved that his lark has been extinguished.  Unless he’s being this much of a buffoon without realizing it, the lamentably presumptive nominee has been daring the party to call his bluff.  So, someone note already that he’s not even holding cards.  Trump’s inability to play poker is why he couldn’t keep a casino open.  It can’t be emphasized enough that the oaf who won’t shut his mouth about his vague success lost money running games stacked in his favor.  Beating the Clintons won’t be easier than bilking retirees determined to plunk away pensions.

Take what’s his and let him put on a show.  The wrestling candidate can throw a staged fit publicly before clandestinely thanking a picture of himself for an answered prayer.  Invent an excuse.  He has very important business tasks to address like counting the bills in each board game, a time-consuming titan’s task which understandably would mean he couldn’t follow through on the losing-to-Hillary thing.  Let him save smirking face by issuing the reason of his choosing for dodging what even someone as delusional in braggadocio as he is must recognize will be humiliation on a USFL scale.  He may appreciate experiencing something as novel as dignity.

Trump is not going to be president whether or not he runs through the election.  Make it official now and give a grownup a chance.  Deep down, the 70-year-old baby will appreciate being forced out via eminent domain.  Let him announce he wants to praise Saddam Hussein with his family. The Party of Rubio can mercifully not make him go through with it. Unlike the Trump Shuttle, this nomination can still fly.

There may not be enough time for an adult to run a campaign.  But progress is presently at zero and holding.  An actual conservative who’s gotten worthwhile things accomplished as an executive like, say, Scott Walker could put forth a better effort in a sprint than Trump could eating donuts at the start line while bragging about the 4:50 miles he’s about to run.  Let him yap while others work.  After all, that’s the inheritance beneficiary’s specialty.  Let’s see how efficient a campaign can be using the college rule of getting work done in whatever time’s available.  If your term paper is due in two hours, type faster.

You know circumstances are bad when Mitt Romney seems like a savior.  But any human with manners who vaguely thinks government might be a little too nosy would be a blessing in this crummiest of years.  The Tangerine Messiah’s fans may nonetheless feel alienated by usurpation, so good.  The nasty runts who put out lawn chairs to reserve spots to watch the wall get built are going to remain hateful, so it may as well be while slipping in a semipro contender. Having something taken is the only way his fans will learn to behave.

Cite the do-over principle.  America needs a restart.  Otherwise, brace for the ultimate poser blaming a conspiracy when he loses 96 percent of states or a shadowy cabal for making his presidency atrocious if he somehow wins after Hillary gets arrested for shoplifting.  The perpetually wronged purported winner will tweet endlessly and semi-literately about what might’ve been.  Let him crab while we have a fun convention for once by commandeering this back.  We’ve earned a little mirth, especially if upheaval means a chance to not vote for a constitutional stain.  Trump doesn’t want to see the nomination through and would be relieved at the chance to retire to his black glass fortress.  Let’s take it anyway.

Serviced Goods

You perform a task valuable enough that someone will give you something for it.  Next, take said something and trade it for a thing or task. This process destroyed America, you know.  Well, it depends on whose tweets you consult.

The process of perpetuating existence used to go unrestrained in this nation, which explains its erstwhile success.   Sophisticated modern man won’t let people just act, as there must be control.  The managers need their cut, which is why you don’t feel rich or free. But at least you can take direction by rule.

Capitalism is not a system.  It’s a brand applied by detractors of making your own money.  Champions of noting imaginary unfairness had a good reason to pretend making money through commerce was diabolical, namely being awful at anything people would buy.

The system is purportedly as undistinguished as it is greedy. But uninhibited trade is truly nothing more than buying things by trading what’s yours.  There’s something evil about the simplest of transactions according to anyone who doesn’t feel like offering value.

Those demanding others buy their goods are the quickest to spot and condemn selfishness.  Even their definition is wrong.  People who haven’t noticed that central control ruined most of the 20th century think politicians peddling favors is capitalism.  In actuality, an indifferent government which only prosecutes fraud is the very way to prevent such sneaky maneuvers. It never occurred to tens of millions of publicly-educated people that retail could take place without official sanction.  Idiots who’ve never made a straight dollar have decided they get to approve every crooked deal.

The grime and callouses indicate you’ve been toiling to pay for what others demand, so your efforts will be commended.  It won’t happen personally: such acknowledgment would encourage individual spirit, which runs counter to unified goals.  Start using “we” as a pronoun.  Hand it over to those with the softest hands around.  Those with the least to share are the most eager to do so.

We’re supposed to be tired of counting cash stacks by now.  The lab results accounted for everything but human behavior.  These particular pseudo-scientists don’t even blow up fun things with chemicals. Instead, they just destroy your retirement plans.  Elaborate theories concocted while pursuing useless degrees that supposedly prove recipients are the smartest never seem to work off campus. Actual earners too busy getting paid while learning skills to pursue postgraduate diplomas.

A bunch of awful people think it’s our species that’s bad. Take their deflating presumption that members won’t help others on their own.  Big government defines psychological projection, which you don’t need a federal grant to see.  The use of force awfully stupid, as well. Government is to money what Taylor Swift is to punk.

Printing cash differs from creating wealth.  The drag on the economy ensures there’ll be plenty more people to help, and the lack of resources ensures there won’t be enough to go around no matter how much is confiscated.  Oh, and it’s pretty lousy to cut that deeply into a paycheck, a fact those who think redistribution is moral seem to miss.  A system that incentivizes longterm reliance creates people who need it while draining the assistance pool.  There wouldn’t be as much destitution if the economy was unleashed, and who would we help then?

If you want to experience what capitalism is, do the opposite of everyone who could be the next president.  Unrestrained exchange is not practiced by either candidate, as you get a distinct choice between a goon who buys favors versus a schemer who sells them.  Do you prefer the flaming aircraft or parachuting into the laser sharks?  Yeah, I’m writing in Alice Cooper, too.

This warped take on free markets is repulsive on its own.  But what’s really sick is that some less well-read comrades think paying off the elected constitutes capitalism.  Unless you’re buying things or time, you’re engaging in cronyism.  Trump is for free markets in the same sense he’s understated.

Spin the wheel and get lucky.  Rent-seeking contributors to either candidate actually do everything they can to distort free markets. There’s nothing fair about this competition.  Needing approval to get in business creates chances to auction slots.  This isn’t the definition of entrepreneurship we had in mind.  You can believe the refs will remain honesty after they’ve been paid off.  Place your Super Bowl bets with me.

A contribution to a politician with waivers in hand is the best way to get ahead.  Give them a little pocket cash to make your problems disappear if you’re unsure. A thinner wallet will help any business owner’s posture.  By contrast, all financial misanthropes want is a system where the government has so little influence that buying a politician would be useless.  It’s easier to do nothing.  Spend money making customers happy instead of senators, unless you like sucking up to get a license.

Too many sad souls have been conditioned to think nothing is possible beyond scraping together a small stipend.  There’s more than bribes cut from bigger bribes.  All it takes is not being told how to act. At least it’s easy.

Equal Agony

Ruining things for everyone else is as virtuous as it gets.  Inequality leads to jealousy, so torch the dwellings in the indigent’s name.  Scooping the ashes will create jobs.  Just listen to anyone delusional enough to think the government is the key to savings.

Circumstances can’t be nice for a mere 90 percent of people, as we must focus on the unsatisfied.  That’s why it’s important to create more of them.  Otherwise, who is there to help?  At least the new system sucks for the purported beneficiaries.  Now everyone gets along thanks to sharing common ground.  This is why you can’t stop smiling.

Everyone gets horrid care so we can all be equally sad.  If universal coverage is good enough for the unselfish utopia of Venezuela, we should be glad for the same.  I’m old enough to remember when buying plans was merely an aggravation instead of a cause for crippling fear.  Most people liked their insurance in those halcyon days of 2007 despite limitations, which it should be noted were caused by oafish federal regulations.  But they disregarded the wishes of pleased customers in the name of sticking lucky victims on Medicaid. Ruining the system for the stubborn urge to pretend everyone get care is a violation of national and human principles.  Oh, and the outcome blows.  Other than that, it’s American.

Infringe for revenge.  Kicking in stall doors will teach bigots who took a moment to check their orientation.  Undressing in front of those with similar genitals is a relic of Puritan times.  Likewise, why do you think you are the way you happen to be, square?  Choose life as a dude or chick if you prefer.  In fact, staying the way you came out of the baby factory is at best boring and at worst oppressive to changers.  Anyone hateful enough to note that swapping genders gets banished, so that little power trip is a side benefit.

Modern man has found another case where everyone in Earth’s history was wrong.  I’m glad we’re so much smarter than all those who contributed accumulated wisdom.  Those dwelling in 2016 are lucky to be sharp and enlightened enough to know that the fundamental biological fact that informs every interaction and leads to the species’ propagation is a folly invented in our minds.

Don’t let the dangly parts trick you into thinking they mean something no matter how much they urge you.  Sure, others might feel uncomfortable while you flaunt what you have while pretending it’s not there. But everyone else is supposed to shrug about their privacy being violated.  Now that’s tolerance.

No matter how preposterous the grievance, the whole population must have their days disrupted in the name of submission.  The benefit of a few outweighs those of the many in these supremely illogical Bizarro Spock times. Don’t follow your feelings, especially when they’re this dumb.

If you want the White House to like you, then commit a felony.  An administration that can’t choose between Iran, Cuba, and Vietnam as a prom date sees every American without a record as a threat.  By contrast, the crimes of others are our fault, of course. Miscreants are forced into it by society because having to produce value is mean. Meanwhile, you’re treated like a violent offender for wanting a gun to defend from them.

The urge to defend genuinely rotten people is a perverse byproduct of thinking everyone else needs your guidance.  A supermarket manager has every right to ask if an applicant has, oh, been convicted of robbing a store.  But now he’s the criminal for posing the question.

Sob stories truly are the best way to govern.  Start weeping until enough saps in power take pity on you.  Those who can keep it together will feel like crying once they’re billed for the demonstrative nature of the shameless.  Our ever-sober leaders always fall for the hard-luck tale, which means worse luck for all. Folks just can’t get ahead somehow while they’re being held back by law.  It’s uncanny how fortune never tips our way.  Another few thousand regulations should bring justice.

The best thing about taking income is how those robbed will totally make more.  Tape bills to your shirt to facilitate redistribution. Putting money others earned into bums’ coffee cups is how this White House has changed the country and mentality over nearly eight listless years. Despite acknowledging that the incumbent has miraculously changed nature itself, many obstinate crabs wonder if not every beggar might be down on his luck.  I know: it’s unhealthy to be suspicious. But we haven’t earned the next evolutionary step.  Please be more faithful.

A policy change shows humans are the same. People are realizing that subsidizing panhandlers might actually be what quells chances to profit via murdering motivation.  Such reactionary thinking leads to punishment like being bumped to the end of the national health queue.  Anyone sanctimonious enough to believe orders will change nature is not going to be big on noticing personal forays into irony.

Inadvertent consequences are the least fun.  The determination to help a sliver that may or may not need it results in everyone feeling unpleasant.  The chance to get ahead offends those who want equality through stagnation.  You’ll have to experience dejection for the good of others that’s not even good, as that’s what America’s about now.  You can’t opt out, as that’s the one type of dissent that’s prohibited.

Anthony Bialy is a writer and “Red Eye” conservative in New York City. Follow him at Download a free ebook of his 2015 columns at