On the Presidential Prowl

I don’t want to talk about politics at all while also wanting to talk about it all the time.  The post-election, pre-inauguration interlude always feels strange for those of us miserable souls who bitch on the topic as a full-time pursuit.  You mean you can stop?  What are you supposed to do: talk to loved ones?  You have to find some first.

It’s easier to look ahead when the rear view features so much charring. Running for president is an unending topic for those who don’t want to move on to a different subject.  While it’s pitiful to discuss the next nominee before the current guy puts on his trainee name tag, it’s good to plan, especially if you have nothing but harping on current events.  Even worse, events currently suck.

Replacing him if he sucks is the one thing sustaining me after the most preposterous election of our time.  Look for Republicans who could yoink that second term just in case Trump is a clueless statist.  He either goes along or faces a primary challenge, so there’s fun either way for everyone but glum liberal Facebook friends.

I’m hoping for the best, um, because I’m an American and want the universe’s best country to keep thriving.  But I’m also aware of how the world works, which is to say not well.  So, plan for disaster.  The possibility is why shrewd people bought insurance without being forced.  A potential primary fighter just has to prove he’s not Trump, which is actually the simplest part.  Then again, vowing to repeal anything signed into law from 2009 to the present would qualify a replacement if the 45th and most improbable president fails to sell the contrast.

Arithmetic is indifferent.  There’s no need to panic like protesters smashing windows over the injustice of adding up votes.  I’m fine if dissenters are rounded up into camps as long as I can be sent to a conservative one and not a social justice-themed compound, as inmate-run therapy sessions to check privilege are probably held outdoors and I prefer shade.  But negativity for the sake of it isn’t a good way to govern or reply.  Indulging in anger rarely fixes problems unless you’re lucky enough to work somewhere with sledgehammers.

Keep your eye on anyone who threatened to start blazes, even if they were aping their loudmouth sect leader by running their mouths instead of actually dispersing napalm.  Playing in the ashes stops being fun once bath time comes around.  Criticizing must be for more than the admittedly joyous opportunity to kvetch. The true alternative to an authoritarian goon is not to elect your own but rather find someone who will leave you to your own means.  It shouldn’t be a request.

Beating Hillary is useless if we end up with a president who flaunts whining as a virtue.  There are better ways to cope with life’s frustrations. We’re still stuck with a president who thinks a bloated, fatuous, menacing government can organize life to peak efficiency.  How could The Walking Dead screw up a zombie adventure?  Producers managed to make it nihilistic and dull because screwing up the simplest things is 2016’s theme.  It’s normal to feel like we’re among the undead.

The Clintons are done.  Isn’t it pleasant?  But getting it together has just begun.  Trump could end up as a more boorish version of the Arkansas twits.  There may need to be a swamp re-draining. Republicans could nominate a polite human who doesn’t epitomize being full of it.  Fretting about the need to take on a president from one’s ostensible side may seem strange. Abnormal times may as well be embraced.

There’s precedent for a quick turnaround with the man who’ll never First Man.  That particular crummy party went from Dukakis to Bill, a victory in the electoral sense if not a particular moral triumph.  Imagine doing the same but getting a candidate worth voting for without feeling shame.

Let’s not place all hope in whoever sounds good that moment.  Again.  Keep an eye out for a governor or congressman takes a stand against potential Trump thuggish silliness.  And don’t worship the figurative admirable person even if they espouse wise policies.  Coronation leads to fear of criticizing a tremendously fallible politician. King Donald’s chintzy crown aside, he’s not entitled to the office. Republicans should break the habit of cheering for anyone wearing the same insignia, which is like wearing a Johnny Manziel jersey in Cleveland.

We’ll know we have the right person by how the candidate in question refuses to be worshipped.  Challenging Trump is how we burn it down, to stick with his adherents’ favorite visual.  He can obey or cope with challenges.  As the new embodiment of the establishment, Trump surely appreciates the back-sass.

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