Anger for Sale

Sore winners aren’t easing the transition to a classyocracy.  Donald Trump’s biggest proxy loudmouths aren’t just still cranky because they’re unpleasant by nature: they actually wanted Hillary.  The rage machine industry is the only one that will thrive without other workers subsidizing it.  Angry AM radio is supported willingly by listeners interested in being unhappy and buying prepper kits.

It can’t be that anyone thought Trump would be fit to serve, so dismiss that absurdity to preserve sanity.  Unpleasant-sounding talk hosts wish they could be bitching about the travesties she would enact.  Now, the ostensible Republican will pimp similarly appalling notions.  But the violations are now good news because he’s on their side.  Theoretically accurate yet still unhinged ranting about the Clinton crime family is more fun than getting what you want if you’re sick enough.  The Laura Ingrahams of the world don’t have the instinct to be in charge for good reason.

The worst thing possible happened for somehow popular populist hosts: Trump won.  The chattering class is now responsible for any unpleasantly preposterous notion their coarse hero puts in play.  Wishing the nasty fools who fell for his shiny campaign good luck is easier upon realizing they won’t receive it.  Time moves forward, to their dismay.

Those with foresight could’ve sat out this game knowing there’s no victor in a Super Bowl between the Cowboys and Patriots.  Instead, they’ll learn a hard lesson about the individual accountability they’ve pretended to promote.  It’s never too late to learn about conservatism with a practical example.

Faux conservative cable news and talk radio is valuable in that it makes listeners feel brighter by comparison.  The election was illuminating not for any particular comment made by a Trump devotee but rather for they thought passed for arguments.  The sincerest converts may be irritable, but at least they’re not bright. I’ll be nicer when they help elect a better candidate.

Supporting Trump means aligning with Eric Bolling. Such an unimaginable Geneva convention violation should be punishment enough.  But we have to suffer along, so ditch qualms about torture that’s self-inflicted, anyway. Government will cop a feel no matter how often we ask it to stop grabbing.  Note who thinks touching without consent is okay as long as someone from their side is putting on the clumsy moves.

The difference between winning and whether or not it’s a good idea is a subtlety lost on unscrupulous goons whose only principle is getting ahead at any cost.  The new year will see them losing respect, if they ever had it.  At least hypotheses may be proven true. Hopefully, the market works in a way economic nationalists who happen to be Republicans don’t understand.  Actual conservatives anticipate a correction in power featuring loss of work for those who think government bribes are okay if administered by a marginal businessman.

Getting everything you wanted is a curse if you’re an idiot.  The claim one can do better is much easier to sustain if one never gets to try.  A chance to prove dooms the inept.  You don’t have to imagine Obama running the system about which he incessantly bitches: you can just dredge up a horrid memory from any random day over the last eight years.  As a deflating sequel, fuming humans will be in control, and they’re not about to calm down after their policies produce consequences.  Against what will they rail?  They’ll limply still blame “globalists” and “elitists” while winking loudly enough to cause feedback.

I don’t want to say the president-elect is ideologically sloppy: I want to tattoo it on those who forced this ludicrous series of events that’s too strange to be called a nightmare.  And I can’t draw.  If the waking horror seems bad, think of those saps who have to makes excuses when Trump tries to pimp liberalism.  True conservative patriots with crying-eagle avatars invested their hopes in a New York City big-government enthusiast.  The discovery won’t make them more pleasant, so shelve those hopes.  But at least we can mock.

As for a guy who deserves to be scolded, cult enlistees can’t admit they were suckered just because it’s obvious.  Shrieking at those who dared notice there was no good reason to get angry without a plan or breathing exercises won’t help govern now.  The worst part about winning without ideas is having to make decisions.

Trumpers are even angrier because they planned to relax through bitching for another term.  They thought they’d be condemning others for noticing how comical their candidate was while sighing to themselves about a dodged bullet.  Now, they have to make up excuses for the ludicrous policies sure to actually happen.  You’d be ranting, too.  You don’t have to sympathize if you chose more wisely.


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