Demolition Profession

Make everything up.  That only sort-of means lying whenever convenient, as it is a popular pastime among those who both adore and despise the election winner.  Be glad for bipartisanship.  The ideology of improvisation inspires the bebop adherent soloing from the Oval Office.  Unfortunately, every riff sounds like an FDR speech.  Donald Trump inevitably calls for solving problems through force of personality.  Even worse, the personality is his.

With two exceptions, we have the best of both worlds.  The one-time epitome of not being hassled is stuck with an outsider without the enthusiastically shrewd perspective we’d hope accompanies someone who hasn’t been consumed by federal drudgery.  The amateur White House doesn’t even bring enthusiasm to compensate.

Worst of all, this invasive era really calls for a professional dismantler.  I’m fine with a career politician as long as said politician has spent adulthood dismantling the gears that crush our wallets.  Instead, America gets someone who can only destroy football leagues and airline shuttles.

The ideal saboteur is familiar with what’s being disassembled.  For the sake of all that is good and decent, cut the right wires.  Sure, you can try to smash the contraption. But the novice will just end up creating dents and broken glass. There’s an art to demolition, as collapsing eyesores takes a plan properly executed.  It’s not as easy as throwing dynamite over one’s shoulder even if many voters hoped for a term of random kablooms.

One must have at least a passing familiarity with a subject if one plans to bullplop through an answer.  People can’t expect the answer to just emerge from inside torsos.  Guts are often idiots despite their reputation for delivering truthful answers.  Similarly, instinct may not be wise no matter how folksy it seems to avoid fancy book learnin’.

Trusting one’s feelings is an excuse to do something presently without thinking out the reasoning behind it or the consequences in front.  It beats planning like some kind of nerd.  Sure, those stupid smart guys are the ones who fix your computer when turning it off and back on fails to work.  On the other hand, there are wacky hijinks ahead for those who don’t plot ahead.  Lame brainiacs never get themselves locked in the ice cream factory overnight, although it’d be nice if they bailed us out.

Someone who knows the system is better at incapacitating it.  The last person you’d expect is the exact one you want sticking the poisonous flash drive into the mainframe.  Quiet types are always the most dangerous. Everyone is braced for the lunatic with the sledgehammer.  An unexceptional clod will make enough noise to alarm all nearby security.

A new hire needs proper experience to lay waste to the office.  We need to know which crossbeams support the most weight if we’re going to get the flattest debris piles.  Studying where to strike is as important as the initial urge to wreck.  Focused energy spurs useful change.  Trumpian rageaholics are just smashing loose bricks into brickbats.  Hurl them at any egghead who suggests threatening companies may not inspire future economic activity.  We live in the now, Poindexter.

One doesn’t necessarily have to have extensive experience turning foreboding structures into neat piles through sagacious application of plastic explosives.  For example, Missouri Governor Eric Greitens is putting unions in his place while holding his first political post. To be fair, he had useful experience in a different previous field, as Navy Seals know where to hit enemy lines.  Meanwhile, Trump was outflanked by a grandma who didn’t want to let him knock down her house. Not every fight is worth waging, although that’s often been a moot point with this pugnacious executive.

Despite Trump’s incessant boasting of everything he’d crush, I’d wager the debt won’t plummet by 2020.  It’s not just that he’s bad at it: his perverse black heart isn’t into worthwhile conflict. Why would a liberal want to dismantle federal programs?  Voters elected a brawler who’ll stand up to anyone.  It’s just that this particular combatant is refusing to touch entitlements.

The only reason to avoid telling workers they shouldn’t expect a pittance in reward for being taxed into nullity is fear.  This ironically timid president refuses to inform the public that unsustainable spending could be replaced by private retirement accounts.  Yes, it’s the same guy who pimps himself as the paragon of honesty, even if he doesn’t know what that means.

Thank heavens we didn’t end up with a reasonable president explaining why we’d have more money if the Treasury took less.  It actually shouldn’t be too hard.  One just has to be capable of explaining arithmetic’s relation to human activity.  For someone who doesn’t drink, Trump could be far more sober.


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