TSA

Take What’s Not Given

Posted on by Anthony Bialy

A brutal beating is the reward for being ordered around by careless bullies.  Complaining about the prize means receiving more of it, so pipe down.  The pandemic was just the start of agony for your benefit.  Our perpetually sluggish economy forgot to reopen.  Business experts who have never ran a business thought prosperity would return like flipping a switch.  Unfortunately, it was powered by California’s grid.

Poor restaurants can’t content themselves with trying to make a couple cents from providing customers with an enjoyable way of ingesting energy.  Heartless advice from those who don’t need to work in the industry to know precisely how to profit with ease applies to every industry.  Cruel dolts shrugging at skyrocketing costs and saying pay employees more shouldn’t talk with their mouths full or empty.

Dinner peddlers are just another type of merchant shrieked at for raising prices.  It makes them like everyone else selling anything.  Condemning the messenger is a favorite hobby of very responsible adults who inflict burdens others bear.

It’s not like people can afford to make their own meals.  Old-timers remember the quaint era when cooking for oneself reflected prudent financial responsibility.  Retaining enough money by not paying someone to make fries kept a bank account full.  But in this emaciated era, the luxury of paying others to combine ingredients in a different kitchen is tougher than discovering a galaxy not plagued by inflation.

Getting coerced for the common bad is the same with electric cars.  Higher gas prices were the plan all along to force consumers to buy plugmobiles to save Earth. Joe Biden should thank Putin for implementing his agenda.

If gasoline were affordable, vehicle owners would just be depressed about having nowhere to go.  Aimless motoring might inspire participants to think they’re free, which leads to even more issues with challenging mindless authority.  Making what literally fuels civilization too costly so they can save Earth isn’t helping said planet or those on it.

You may notice a natural revulsion to being penalized for the crime of traveling, so those whose policies hearken to the Stone Age have to pretend making gasoline more costly than plutonium will shepherd in the future.  Taking credit for a slight drop after they caused a tremendous hike isn’t fooling anyone any more than being excused from paying bills.

It’s not that Biden wants Russia to use nukes, but mushroom clouds sure would distract from inflation.  Fallout might then be a problem.  It’s too late to duck and cover.

Free cash has a catch.  Precocious kindergarteners might have figured out that being handed all the currency you can spend doesn’t work.  A president born before D-Day still can’t figure it out.

This unsellable White House gets how exchange works in a sick way.  Putzing foes of commerce know enough to treat free citizens like experiment subjects who are motivated by avoiding fearful results.  The only market understanding takes the form of issuing pain to implement daft schemes that need to be compulsory for good reason.  Punishing the law-abiding for trying to earn their fortunes while treating criminals like sufferers will make even liberals with the bloodiest hearts miss alleged oppression.

Getting away with something differs entirely from whether something’s correct.  It’s mean to end up justifying the means justifying the ends.  The present executive branch pretends the former proves the latter.  Presuming citizens will just accept the overwhelming infiltration as an inevitability shouldn’t be such a safe bet.

Botching lurching is government’s specialty.  The behemoth that inflicted the TSA isn’t about to employ foresight or subtlety.  Those with the temerity to travel are forced to just accept that one diabolical loser two decades ago concealing a bomb in his footwear means you have to wander about the security area in our socks for eternity.

Don’t let the most diabolical keep inflicting damage.  Terrorists may as well have known American flyers would be hassled just like China new aspiring gubernatorial dictators figured they would paralyze their foe via alleged adversaries citing imaginary emergency powers to make their economies collateral victims.  Stop doing the bidding of bad guys.  Overwhelming power in the hands of underwhelming humans causes endless irksome hassles.

Our guardians forgot to stop harassing.  Not getting to be free is for our benefit, so we sure are lucky for continual bothering.  Pushy alleged leaders are so accustomed to saving us from ourselves that they wanted to continue indefinitely.  Their kindness is boundless.

Abusers of quite limited powers don’t even need an excuse.  Enemies of cops know they’d abuse the law if they enforced it, and psychological projection has way too many real-world examples.  The work of elected despots is so crucial that they can’t be constrained by checks and balances.  They sidestep barriers to collective utopia in case we’re feeling silly and want to decline having our rights confiscated so we can finally enjoy stress-free living.

I’m sure constitutional authors just wanted to deny the joy that follows streamlining.  Ancient historians believed governmental efficiency used to prevent it for everyone else.  That’s exactly the sort of dissent that needs to be eliminated if we’re interested in being brought together for communal harmony.  It’s not like you have a choice.

Kabuki Quarantine

Posted on by Anthony Bialy

The government needs to keep you from living to keep you alive. Sickness is nothing new. Histrionic overreach is their only specialty. Mid-level elected executives turned broad suffering into specific interdictions about unrelated matters. Hassling maskless restaurant patrons brings to mind pointlessly invasive September 11 measures that haven’t made us safe since. Confiscating liberty can only get worse if there are no marginal benefits.

Panic always motivates rational responses, so be sure to get wound up about the news. Those interfering with your business for your own good always use a totally calm counterpoint, which is that opponents of being bothered by law are demons wearing human skins who want everyone to croak. The claim is even more risible when made by those who tried to make nursing homes fun by letting everyone share a lethal disease.

We can move without fear through the sky thanks to an unwieldy legalized harassment squad staffed with the nation’s ruder high school dropouts and convicted felons. You feel safer in the clouds, right?

TSA set the precedent for bothering Americans as a reply to horror. Pat the heads of anyone claiming security theater has prevented any terror measures. Then pat the bathing suit area, because they tacitly admitted they like it. To be fair, people who are useless even by federal standards have stopped plenty of travelers from making flights. It’s easier to harass the innocent than terrorists, if not quite practical.

If al-Qaeda wanted flyers to remove shoes, they won. Hopeful passengers are still wandering aimlessly around security checkpoints protected from hideous floors with nothing but socks almost 19 years after that vile dastard tried to light his footwear fuse. And the liquid bomb plot was in 2006 if you wonder why you can’t bring a Dr Pepper aboard in 2020. Tales of carrying liquids on flights are legends at this point. Those out to attack surely haven’t attempted to devise new methods to inflict atrocities. But being kept thirsty surely makes air travel safe.

Security professionals couldn’t spend a few seconds talking to passengers. Those obsessed with tolerant equality to the point of risking everyone’s lives are focused on implements instead of humans with nefarious intentions, which for the record is also why gun control doesn’t work. It’s simply uncanny how the same principles apply to different issues. Similarly, bandana fetishists refuse to acknowledge common sense can do more to defeat an epidemic than mandatory cotton facial application.

Concerned people have done more than any bossy order to stop the contagion. Common sense is the best protection, which is why fans of big government think we’re stuck with getting infected forever. Those who totally trust their fellow humans think simple wisdom must be mandated. Overreaching has created economic and human depression, but it’s crucial to build counterproductive dependence.

There’s little hope of order when forces of chaos get to impose their wills. Governments are reactive by nature, as they have to see what damage they inflict before they announce how to fix it. Residents who had dwellings ransacked are trying to rebuild after a toddler tornado, with the difference being legal adults don’t have the excuse of being two years into life and experiencing the energy jolt provided by consuming handfuls of Sour Patch Kids for the first time. Anyone tasked with cleaning up after the immature can only attempt to repair some of the damage’s effects. I’m sorry about your coffee table.

Capricious restrictions in the face of contagious disease are the opposite of scientific. I hope the illness is prevented by superstition, as the only other method currently being deployed as a bulwark is sanctimony. Call your birthday party a rally against injustice to keep Democratic governors from ordering dispersal.

Faith will protect you, according to our present understanding of epidemiology. Chant about six feet while wearing a ceremonial mask to maintain health. The only way to stay safer is to attend a protest enchanted against infection. Your cause just has to reach a certain level of righteousness, like wanting to replace cops with social workers.

Capricious orders are the most caring, as they mean benevolent saviors sense troubles unenlightened commoners don’t. Being told what to do only seems like a random burden to the benighted.

Those who don’t grasp how good they have it with their lives limited think they’re being held back by governors who don’t understand politics. Surely, office-fillers grasp the subtle scientific complexities involved in spreading illness. Political science majors who became lawyers are renowned for knowing how experiments work.

If you’re already feeling sick, knowing we could’ve been done with this stupid illness might not make you feel better. People could have coped as it passed and immunity built while washing our hands and sticking grandma in a John Travolta bubble. But then we wouldn’t have shut down the fundamental aspects of society for months.

The era for speciousness will always feature claims of unilaterally shutting down interactions prevented life from turning into a zombie movie. Sagacious elected prophets kept you safe by ruining your life, and you won’t even build statues. You’re so ungrateful just because you noticed all this ruin didn’t even help. The same people don’t think more cops prevent crime from happening in the first place need you to stay in solitary confinement just until life has no more problems.

Half-Irked, Half-Bored

Posted on by Anthony Bialy

The plan to beat Americans into submission has worked well, which makes it the only thing presently functioning.  Everyone residing in this erstwhile kick-ass nation should be in revolt over how much they’re bossed around.  Instead, many got in the mindless habit of complying.  I guess receiving directions is easier than the anxiety of decisions.

Exercising autonomy is subversive, at least according to those conditioned to obey.  The government was trying to beat down citizens so they wouldn’t be upset about vanquished liberty.  At least, they’re better at cynicism than commerce.

Ask the guy plummeting off the cliff how many more stop signs he needed. There have been too many moments that have passed by which should’ve provided clarifying realizations to ostensibly free people.  The quantity of preposterous intrusions is overwhelming for a reason. Politicians think they’re smarter than the vaguely fellow humans over which they rule.  Those elected don’t have a choice.  Those who elected should feel shame for being too lazy to think further.

A business plan is tricky to assemble, so bossy leaders will forego private sector work in favor of ordering everyone to quit worrying. First, they need to convince those they see as subjects that independent thought is as pointless as it is dangerous.  As a result, we cope with the perfectly perverse humiliation of a president who kneels for despots while kneecapping Americans.  The incessant invasion into our right to buy what we wish from whom we’d like is beyond tiresome.  Thanks to doughy federal agencies concluding it’s in their interest to monitor your health, you can’t even enjoy any food you can afford.

As a reminder, you’re still subject to an insurance mandate in a country founded upon telling authority to sod off. The notion of piping down and obeying offends the ghosts of every patriot who died before 2008.  The specters are also horrified by how we wait in line to be molested by nasty felonious high school dropouts for the honor of traveling by plane.  The TSA shouldn’t be the result of conquering the sky.  Stuffing ourselves either in the sky or on land is also frowned upon because we apparently lost a war.  Humans have every damn right to consume ice cream from the container despite lemmings claiming the Celery Patrol’s warrantless searches are for our own good.

The junkie needs an intervention to see how low he’s sunk.  You may find it hard to tell if these addicts scorn the Constitution or are simply ignorant of their own capabilities as humans able to make decisions.  It’s a fun game.  At least be glad the executive respects the amazing framework.  Oops. Well, maybe that’ll happen if there’s anyone left who wants the respect that accompanies letting people address their own health needs.  The alternative is to continue letting the government presume we would never buy plans to counteract diseases we don’t presently have.

Those old people who wrote our rulebook didn’t know there’d ever be suffering.  Let’s pool our resources to counter the hoary idea that values and experiences are universal.  Next, embrace the deflating notion that we can’t understand each other unless we share identical backgrounds.  We may as well burn Shakespeare’s works.  That oppressive honky had the nerve to think consequences follow actions.

At least psychology textbook publishers have ample material.  They should send Christmas cards to everyone who casually accepts rights violations.  Taking income sure seems like legalized theft if you ponder what’s taken compared to what’s returned.  Well, it helps others and makes the economy purr, if you haven’t heard the claims. Plus you don’t want anarchy, do you?  Hand over half your working life’s reward or the wolves will take over the streets.

Dare enjoy food?  Calorie counts take the happiness right off your tongue. Representatives of a chunky government have decided it’s their right to control your salty impulses.  Some tasteless drones assent because they think it’s someone else’s job to make decisions.  As a result, you’re forced to notice how much energy your ice cream pint contains lest you think of momentarily forgetting consequences.  Doesn’t the Constitution list weight monitoring as one of government’s functions?  If not, it should.  It’s for our own good, much like smugness about how, say, it’s fine to ban plastic bags because enlightened comrades use the bacteria factories they call reusable sacks.  A vague benefit requires infringing on your specific rights.

Take a picayune restriction to counter the massive interdiction.  The oscillation between massive incursions into our lives with irksome regulations doesn’t offer much variety.  Humans should feel the urge to flip off those wagging fingers in their faces. Instead, some bees scoff at those who dare think honey belongs to the insects who made it.  Resist such buggy behavior.  Don’t ask permission first.

Anthony Bialy is a writer and “Red Eye” conservative in New York City. Follow him at http://twitter.com/AnthonyBialy. Download a free ebook of his 2015 columns at https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/604353.