America’s safe from secession, as those declaring war are unable to do pushups. It’s testament to the politeness of conservatives that their harassers aren’t picking up teeth. Commit a crime and don’t fear consequences. That makes it just like everything else in the feckless hoodlums’ lives. It’s no wonder they believe what they do.
There are also 100 percent fewer shootings in the era of open harassment than promised. It’s uncanny how liberals always predict exactly what doesn’t happen. I credit remarkable restraint of the side with all the guns, which again shows a misunderstanding of human nature with blessed consequences.
You’d think those self-righteously getting in the faces of those audacious enough to vote differently would learn outrage is backfiring. But that implies they’re capable. Picking up evidence is as foreign to them as manners. How can they behave while saving the world?
Modern opposition members are concerned they’re not impolite enough. Their unfortunate strategy means they’re justified in their skulls to be atrocious. Portraying foes as villains is accurate, right? After all, they are confronting little Eichmanns who soullessly maintain that some money spent by Washington is being wasted.
This isn’t a normal era, claim those who need justification for acting abnormally. See, those who refuse to join their mouthy throngs are racist homophobes who are also sexists as a third full-time job. Working doesn’t hold much appeal. Therefore, yelling at Trump staffers in restaurants isn’t merely okay but also a moral imperative. With such airtight reasoning, it’s no wonder they believe the key to happiness is to make everyone else as miserable.
Anyone claiming that competition raises prices is going to be resistant to reasoning. Take what they must think in order to ostracize dissent. The enlightened among us open-mindedly claim everyone who disagrees is a bigot, which is why they can be closed-minded to them. It’s almost a neat trick. Like everything else fans of massive government believe, it doesn’t hold up to four seconds of scrutiny. But they’re too busy proclaiming that children will croak if parents are ever allowed to send a little less money to the Treasury.
This isn’t a unique era despite what very special individuals claim. The same disgusting assaults on dignity would be happening if Scott Walker were sweeping up Obamacare’s ashes. In fact, the resistors would be even nastier: a grownup president may have already rebuilt much of what was wrecked during the previous two terns, which is a far greater threat than Trump pouring lighter fluid on the charred remains. Every Republican justifies emergency mode, especially when Hillary’s last holdouts canonize George W. Bush despite claiming he was too rotten for Satan last decade.
Those to Trotsky’s right isn’t simply misguided: they’re diabolical. Your natural rights and retained paychecks cause leftists to believe Hell is real. Everyone claiming corpses result from the opposition’s policies conveniently forgets how atrocious their own results are. They’re too busy damning those who dare opine that people should be able to buy their own insurance.
More than anything, I loathe those who compare everything they dislike to Nazis for making me defend Trump. The prototypical loudmouthed schmuck has no idea what he’s doing, and yet I’m compelled to note he may not be chaining orphans in the sulfur mines under the White House. The worst part is how liberal he is. What exactly do they think tariffs are other than a tax by people who know how you should spend your money?
I’m also cranky because missed the chance to be rude. I never thought to stake out restaurants during Obama’s presidency to find those who were messing up the country. Patriots were apparently supposed to shriek at Ben Rhodes as he tried to finish his cheesecake for vainly bribing our atomic-minded enemy with our hard-earned cash. And nobody ruined Kathleen Sebelius’s night at the cinema for the appalling mandate. We disagreed without being disagreeable, and that’s a missed chance that’ll never come back.
People are screaming about where civility went. We should agree with their ludicrous policies so we can finally have amity. They’ll start to behave once nobody disagrees. Those who engage in sanctimony as a lifestyle have no idea how motivation works.
At least we understand why their policies fail even if they don’t. They’re too busy stalking restaurants to think out why they’re helping the other side. Keep thinking uncouthness is effective: it makes defeating grabby nonsense much easier.
Anthony Bialy 